Birth Control

Standard

YES! YES! YES! I love you Sophia!

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #Health #Body #Healthcare #Medical #BirthControl #Statistics #Facts #Truth #Medicine #Women #Insurance #Benefits #MenAreMorons #FemalePower #KnowTheTruth #Real #SophiaBush #Blogger #Blog #Blogging #Follow #Daily #Good #ElectedOfficials #MYBODY #MyBusiness

October

Standard

October is a really hard month for me & it has been for most of my life actually. It’s full of ups & downs…birthdays, anniversaries of peoples deaths & I despise Halloween for multiple reasons, so I’m normally a mess during the month of October.
October is the month where I’m usually on the grid, off the grid, back on the grid & back off the grid…it’s a pretty unstable month for me in every way imaginable.
I try to be social but I know I’m awkward & depressed & I don’t want to bring others down so I end up becoming reclusive. I don’t necessarily realize I’m doing it either but when I do realize, I try to rectify it. I try to socialize but realize I’m buzz kill & it becomes a crazy circle of crap.

20171012_090917.jpg

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #October #Month #Suck #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #Reclusive #Social #Socialize #Awkward #Hard #Difficult #Birthday #Death #Tears #Anniversary #Unstable #Halloween #Blogger #Blogging #Blog #Follow #Daily #Battle #BrokenHeart #Pain

All Year Round

Standard

October is ALWAYS hard, but to be honest…my heart is broken all year round.
IMG_20171008_223546_466.jpg

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #ARMY #SupportOurTroops #America #USA #Patriot #Patriotic #Always #FallenButNotForgotten #LoveYou #MissYou #OperationIraqiFreedom #Fallen #Angel #GodBlessAmerica #Specialist #October #BrokenHeart #Follow #FOREVER #Cousin #Cousins #Wings #Heart

Strong Women

Standard

“A strong woman builds her own world. She is one who is wise enough to know that it will attract the man she will gladly share it with.” – Ellen J. Barrier, How to Trust God When All Other Resources Have Failed

“She made broken look beautiful & strong look invincible. She walked with the Universe on her shoulders & made it look like a pair of wings.” – Ariana Dancu

IMG_20170922_155359_098.jpg

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #Love #Like #QOTD #Quotes #Quote #POTD #Picture #Pictures #Strength #Strong #Women #Beauty #Beautiful #Pretty #Class #Classy #Daily #Good #Independent #Follow

Unused Bravery

Standard

I’m pretty stoked about the new drama series about to start on NBC entitled, “The Brave.”

Why? Obviously, I’m a true patriot! But beyond that, it’s a part of me…bravery. I don’t mean to sound conceited or anything else horrible, but if I had to be one hundred percent honest, I would say that I am truly one of the bravest people I know. I wasn’t really given a chance to be anything but brave, however, I would choose to be brave either way.

I sit here and often question things. Why? Why was I made to be so brave and honestly, so incredibly strong and yet, I’m forced to be STUCK at home fighting illnesses. I understand that absolutely everything is God’s work. Everything is part of God’s plan. I totally get it. I just wish I understood WHY. God gave me the strength, the courage, the heart…and I don’t understand what I’m suppose to be doing with it, other than surviving incurable illnesses of course.

I do often feel I have wasted talent, stored strength and unused bravery.

If you look up the show on the IMDB website, the synopsis will tell you this:

”The complex world of our bravest military heroes who make personal sacrifices while executing the most challenging and dangerous missions behind enemy lines.”

The show fits my personality to the letter. I want to go in and help. I want to serve my country and do everything I can to protect, save and defend it. I’m smart, I’m adaptable (CLEARLY), I can crush challenges thrown my way and I’ve proved it time and time again.

USE ME. Make me useful.

20170312_102704

#FightForIt #SilverLinings #My #Life #Bravery #Brave #Unused #Strength #Strong #Heart #Autoimmune #Diseases #Disease #NoCure #Purpose #God #Help #Why #Fighting #Battle #NBC #Show #Question #Questions #Blog #Blogger #Blogging #Writer #Writing #Write

I am Fierce

Standard

I don’t handle compliments regarding my strength very well. I don’t feel strong, I don’t feel brave, I don’t feel dignified or graceful and I think it’s because half of the time I feel like I’m a fraud.
Most of the time people see only the outer shell which is a smile, laughter and jokes. If I do my hair, my makeup and I wear my poker face just right, no one has a clue what’s really going on.
I’m a mess. I am a walking disaster. There is so much going on underneath the surface regarding my health that’s sometimes I have no idea how I’m still standing upright.
But at the end of the day, I want to be somebody who overcomes all of the obstacles and tribulations put on my path.
I want to be somebody who continues to fight and I want to find the silver linings beneath all of the heavy, dirty, messy hardships this life keeps throwing at me.
Life is hard and delicacy won’t be enough. I’m choosing to be fierce.

Per Merriam-Webster

Definition of fierce

fiercer; fiercest

1a :violently hostile or aggressive in temperament a fierce tiger

b :given to fighting or killing :pugnacious fierce fighters

2a :marked by unrestrained zeal or vehemence a fierceargument

b :extremely vexatious, disappointing, or intense fiercepain

3:furiously active or determinedmake a fierce effort

4:wild or menacing in appearance

— fierceness noun

“If I have to be fierce, I’ll be fierce.” – Quvenzhane Wallis

“I am not a snowflake. I am not a sweet, infantilising symbol of fragility and life. I am a strong, fierce, flawed adult woman. I plan to remain that way, in life and in death.” – Stella Young

2017-09-11_19.27.43

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #Fierce #Strength #Strong #Truth #True #Health #Chronic #Disease #Illness #Warrior #Sick #Pain #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #Melanoma #UlcerativeColitis #UC #JPouch #EPI #ExocrinePancreaticInsufficiency #Bladder #Blog #Blogger #Blogging #Follow

Authentic Self

Standard

Unfortunately when other people are miserable, their main goal is to make everybody else miserable. It’s like a sickness. It becomes a disease.

We’re all human and we all have things to deal with. There’s no sense in trying to bring other people down just because you yourself are down.

Instead, why not look for those who are happy and positive and try to have a little bit of that rub off onto you.

Personally, when I’m down, I try to find some uplifting people and messages that I can apply and try to boost my life up! Being sad and miserable is not living, it’s not fun and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone else no matter how poorly I feel.

“Because messed up people try to MESS you up.”

In the middle of all the chaos, remember that how someone else treats you doesn’t determine YOUR value. What they say or do doesn’t lessen who you are. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone and you don’t have to impress anyone. Just be who your authentic self. Be who God made you to be.

20170908_043520

#FightForIt #SilverLining #My #Life #Authentic #Self #OthersOpinions #KnowYourWorth #Beauty #Beautiful #Classy #WhatMatters #Blog #Blogger #Blogging #Follow #Friends #Friend #Truth #Real #Human #Daily #Good #Always #Forever #IAmMe #WontBreak #Honest