Keeping Faith

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I get asked (A LOT) how it is that I remain so strong in my faith when I have so many bad things to face.

It’s called “faith” for a reason.

Dictionary.com defines “faith” with the following:

[feyth]

noun

1. confidence or trust in a person or thing:faith in another’s ability.

2. belief that is not based on proof:He had faith that the hypothesis would be substantiated by fact.

3. belief in God or in the doctrines or teachings of religion:the firm faith of the Pilgrims.

4. belief in anything, as a code of ethics, standards of merit, etc.:to be of the same faith with someone concerning honesty.

5. a system of religious belief: the Christian faith; the Jewish faith.

6. the obligation of loyalty or fidelity to a person, promise, engagement, etc.:Failure to appear would be breaking faith.

7. the observance of this obligation; fidelity to one’s promise, oath, allegiance, etc.:He was the only one who proved his faith during our recent troubles.

8. Christian Theology.the trust in God and in His promises as made through Christ and the Scriptures by which humans are justified or saved.

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I don’t have to see God to know that He is real and I don’t have to know His plan to understand that He has one. Without suffering there can be no compassion. I know in my heart that there is a reason why I have been dealt the hand that I have been and I know that there’s a reason I’m going through everything that I am.

Ultimately, life is about staying strong & not straying from faith even when it seems like everything in your life is a big pile of poo. You don’t give up when things are bad. You don’t think God is false because things don’t go your way or you didn’t get what you asked for.

It’s all for a reason! Everything in life is part of HIS plan.

#FightForIt #SilverLining #Strong #Strength #Faith #God #Christian #Follow #Blogger #Blog #Blogging #Chronic #Disease #Illness #Warrior #Sick #Pain #Life #Time #Truth #Good #Steady

Where Did Kerry Go?

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When I was twenty years old, I was officially diagnosed with depression, anxiety and PTSD. I was prescribed depression medications and BAM…the see-saw ride of my body changing began. I gained weight. On top of gaining weight, I became a zombie that didn’t care about anything anymore, so I asked to be switched to a different medication. Thank goodness it was a medication that helped, I was able to work off the weight and I turned back into a human again.

But this was just the beginning of the story that is still being written. My body is still in mad chaos but now, I have zero control over it. I’m thirty-two years old now and over the years, I’ve managed to acquire one medical ailment on top of another, on top of another, on top of another and so on. I’m on medications for ailments and then I’m on medications to counteract the side effects of the original medications and my body is reacting in so many ways and it’s absurd. My body is reacting both inside and out. The most infuriating part of all of it is me not having any say in the matter. I’m helpless and honestly, I feel hopeless most of the time.

I cry almost daily. I look in the mirror and I wonder, where did Kerry go? I don’t recognize the person I see and I know I will never see the person I was before all of this started. I just wonder if I will ever see someone I can be happy with or at least satisfied with. Until then, I suppose I will continue with my daily routine of crying as I see my reflection.

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#FightForIt #SilverLining #Life #Chronic #Disease #Illness #Warrior #NoCure #Autoimmune #Cancer #Cervix #Melanoma #UlcerativeColitis #UC #JPouch #Exhausted  #Sick #Pain #EPI #ExocrinePancreaticInsufficiency #PSC #PrimarySclerosingCholangitis #Bladder #Migraine #Body #Image #Reflection #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD