Creativity Slapped

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Creativity just slapped me in the face!

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Love, Not Blood

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It’s taken a little while for this to truly sink in for me. I’ve never had a close family & that’s really all I’ve EVER wanted.

The reality is, I’m 31. More than likely, it won’t happen. I’ve forgiven. I’ll never forget. My family is toxic…plain & simple.

It’s a grieving process. It’ll be continuous battle, but I’ll make it through because family isn’t blood, it’s love. I’ve learned that I’m incredibly loved & I am SO blessed & thankful!

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Signs of Domestic Violence

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Signs of Domestic Violence
Most relationships have difficult times, and almost every couple argues now and then. But violence is different from common marital or relationship problems. Domestic violence is a pattern of abuse that a partner-former or current partner, spouse, or boyfriend or girlfriend-uses to control the behavior of another.

Domestic violence often starts with threats, name-calling, and slamming doors or breaking dishes, and it can build up to pushing, slapping, and other violent acts. If you are concerned about your relationship, ask yourself the following questions.

Does your partner:

● Embarrass you with put-downs?

● Look at you or act in ways that scare you?

● Control what you do, who you see or talk to, or where you go?

● Stop you from seeing your friends or family members?

● Take your money or paycheck, make you ask for money, or refuse to give you money?

● Make all of the decisions?

● Tell you that you’re a bad parent or threaten to take away or hurt your children?

● Threaten to kill himself or herself?

● Prevent you from working or going to school?

● Act like the abuse is no big deal or is your fault, or even deny doing it?

● Destroy your property or threaten to kill your pets?

● Intimidate you with guns, knives, or other weapons?

● Shove you, slap you, choke you, or hit you?

● Threaten to kill you?

If any of these things or other types of abuse are happening, you need to seek help. It’s important to know that you are not alone. The way your partner acts is not your fault. Help is available.

Signs that someone you know is being abused

Do you have a friend, coworker, relative, or neighbor who you think may be in an abusive relationship?

Here are some signs to watch for:

● For injuries that look like they came from choking, punching, or being thrown down. Black eyes, red or purple marks at the neck, & sprained wrists are common injuries in violent relationships.

● Attempting to hide bruises with makeup or clothing

● Making excuses like tripping or being accident-prone or clumsy. Often the seriousness of the injury does not match up with the explanation.

● Having few close friends and being isolated from relatives and coworkers and kept from making friends

● Having to ask permission to meet, talk with, or do things with other people

● Having little money available; may not have credit cards or even a car

Other warning signs:

● Having low self-esteem; being extremely apologetic and meek

● Referring to the partner’s temper but not disclosing the extent of the abuse

● Having a drug or alcohol abuse problem

● Having symptoms of depression, such as sadness or hopelessness, or loss of interest in daily activities

● Talking about suicide, attempting suicide, or showing other warning signs of suicide. Encourage this person to talk with a health professional.

Be supportive, and let your friend know that you are there to listen & help. For more information.

Reference: WebMD

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Beauty Everywhere

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“If you truly love nature, you’ll find beauty everywhere.” – Van Gogh

Well said Van Gogh, but I have a slight adjustment. If you truly love LIFE, you’ll find beauty everywhere (AKA silver linings).

Finding silver linings is a daily practice & something I personally practice EVERY-SINGLE-DAY. It’s not always easy & sometimes, it seems downright impossible! However, determination is an incredibly powerful thing.

Today is a great example. I feel BLAH. But last night, I went to the movies with my handsome husband & was able to enjoy it. That’s a RARE thing these days. So my silver lining may be from yesterday, but it keeps pushing me for more.

Silver linings can be the smallest of things. Again, I feel BLAH, so my gratitude for having ginger ale readily available is INSANE! I have three dogs who adore me & even though they’re obnoxious & in my face, they know I need love.

There is beauty EVERYWHERE. Others see dandelions as weeds, but I see wishes. Others find cloudy days depressing, but I find them relaxing. Others hate the cold, but to me, it’s a chilly reminder that all seasons will come & go.  Stay strong & push through it.

Life is about attitude, perspective, reaction, & determination.

Love this fragile life & the beauty it holds all day, everyday.

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No Regrets. Lessons Learned.

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This is my life’s motto. I don’t regret ANYTHING that I’ve done or that has happened. Everything in life is meant to teach us something. We’re meant to take those lessons, learn from them, apply the knowledge, & grow. THAT is what life is about. THAT is how we grow spiritually & mentally.

Things don’t always go as planned or turn out the way we thought & that’s okay. As I’ve stated in previous posts, just because things didn’t go the way we imagined, doesn’t mean they can’t be just as great or even better than we thought. The key is to refocus.

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Love, Grace, & Gratitude

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“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, & gratitude.” – Denis Waitley

I strive to love, be happy, grateful, & as graceful as possible. I fall short ALL OF THE TIME, but I will continue to always try my hardest.

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A Few Confessions of a Chronically Ill Warrior

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I spend most of my day in the bathroom.
I cry more than I care to admit.
My entire body is always exhausted…along with my mind & emotions.
Anxiety takes over all of me constantly.
I have PTSD due to many reasons.
I hate my body.
I cry when I see myself naked.
I feel like a burden 99% of the time.
I severely contemplated suicide…to the point of having everything planned out.
I have so many ailments & medications, I can’t remember them all, so they’re all written down.
I’ve never truly felt safe.
Some days are so awful, I literally get out of bed, just to relocate to the couch.
I hate food. Food means going to the bathroom.
When I had my ileostomy, I stayed as hidden as possible.
I cry every time someone tells me I’m strong, beautiful, or graceful. I don’t feel like I am any of those things.
I’ve almost died, more than once, & I hate what it did to my family.
I feel guilty.
Whenever I go somewhere, I HAVE to locate the restroom before anything else.
If I’m in the car for more than ten to fifteen minutes, anxiety kicks in something fierce.
I fell like agoraphobia will take over me.
I don’t feel like I’m living. I’m only existing.

But no matter what, I will #FIGHTFORIT

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